12 things happy couples do differently

Marriage is a game of variables, and variables can always be good or bad. The question remains: why is it that in the same year, month, or day, some couples’ marriages get worse, leading to divorce, while other couples’ marriages get stronger and better?

The problem is not the marriage itself; the problem is the couples and what they do with their marriage. Bad variables in marriage are the things couples do that ruin their marriage, and good variables are the things couples do that improve their marriage.

So, in marriages that thrive and are happy, there must be something they do that unhappy couples are not doing. This is why I have written this blog post on things happy couples do differently, to help you see how you can join the class of happy couples with good variables.

12 Things Happy Couples Do Differently

These things that happy couples do differently will help you be among the couples whose marriages thrive, no matter the phase your marriage goes through.

1. Happy Couples Communicate Openly

One of the things happy couples do differently is that they engage in effective communication.

An open and honest communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. In a situation where emotions are running high, unhappy couples will rather harbor negative thoughts about their partner and the situation, and keep away from each other than help each other solve the conflict at hand.

What happy couples do differently is that they prioritize open and honest dialogue, which allows them to understand each other’s thoughts, feelings, and perspectives.

No matter how hard it is, they don’t shy away from difficult conversations but approach them with a sense of empathy and a willingness to listen. This openness creates trust and reduces misunderstandings, creating a safe space for both partners to express themselves freely.

Happy couples engage in communication involving clear speaking and active listening. They validate each other’s feelings, which makes each of them feel respected and understood. This quality of open communication strengthens their bond and helps them navigate through challenges together with effective communication.

2. Happy Couples Express Gratitude Regularly

One thing that happy couples understand is that it can be worse, and there are people that they have it better than. Therefore with this mindset, they use gratitude to maintain a loving and healthy relationship. Happy couples make it a habit to express appreciation for each other, both for the big gestures and the small everyday actions.

Expressing gratitude can be as simple as saying “thank you” or leaving a heartfelt note. These small acts of appreciation go a long way in making your partner feel valued and loved.

One of the things the happiest couples do differently is to acknowledge and celebrate each other’s efforts and accomplishments, showing that they support their partner. This regular expression of gratitude helps create an atmosphere of love in the relationship and reminds each partner of the good qualities they admire in each other.

Happy couples often use these beautiful ideas on how to appreciate your partner.

3. Happy Couples Maintain A Sense Of Humor

A sense of humor is a powerful tool in any relationship.

Happy couples know how to laugh together and find joy in the little things. They use humor to lighten the mood during tough times and to bond over shared experiences. This lifestyle of both spouses helps to keep the relationship fun and dynamic, preventing it from becoming stagnant or overly serious.

Maintaining a sense of humor also means not taking things too personally and being able to laugh at oneself and this is one of the things that happy couples excel at.

One of the small things happy couples do differently is that they use humor as a way to diffuse tension and to show that they don’t take themselves too seriously. This lightheartedness creates a positive and beautiful environment where both partners feel comfortable and relaxed.

4. Happy Couples Prioritize Quality Time Together

Unhappy couples will come up with a thousand excuses as to why they are unable to spend time with their partner. Happy couples understand that spending quality time together is important for maintaining a strong connection. Happy couples prioritize this time of their day, they ensure that they regularly engage in activities that they both enjoy.

Quality time is about more than just being physically present; it’s about being emotionally and mentally present with the love of your life. Happy couples always make it a habit to focus on each other during these moments. They get rid of distractions like phones and laptops which helps them give their significant other their undivided attention showing that they value each other’s company.

Unlike unhappy couples, one of the things happy couples do differently is that they find several ways to spend time together. This includes date nights like date night ideas, shared hobbies like a couple’s bucket list, or simply spending an evening at home together like at-home date ideas.

By making time for each other, they strengthen their bond and create lasting memories.

5. Happy Couples Support Each Other’s Goals

What kind of a partner would you be if you don’t support your partner in getting to the top of their career or being the best version of themselves?

Supporting each other’s personal and professional goals is a hallmark of a happy relationship. Support can come in many forms, from offering assistance to their partner to providing emotional encouragement.

Happy couples celebrate each other’s successes and provide encouragement when their other half is down using these words of encouragement for your partner. This support creates that sense of partnership and companionship that makes the bleak days brighter and silent days melodious.

Happy couples encourage each other to pursue their dreams and provide the necessary support to achieve them. This mutual encouragement helps each partner grow and develop, both individually and as a couple.

6. Happy Couples Resolve Conflicts Respectfully

Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. Conflict can either bring you both closer or drive you further apart.

While unhappy couples will drift from their partner, one of the things that healthy couples do differently is that they handle conflict differently.

They approach conflicts with a sense of willingness to find a resolution that works for both of them. Instead of resorting to blame or criticism, they focus on understanding each other’s perspectives and finding common ground.

In their desire to resolve the conflict at hand, they engage in active listening, empathy, and a focus on solutions rather than problems.

Happy couples avoid destructive behaviors like avoiding insults because they are words you should never say to your partner. This attitude helps to resolve the conflicts quicker and prevents them from causing lasting damage to the relationship.

7. Happy Couples Show Physical Affection

Physical affection is an important way to express love and maintain intimacy in a relationship. One of the things happy couples do differently is that they regularly show affection through gestures like hugging, holding hands, and kissing on the lips and other acts like;

• Kissing on the forehead
• Cuddling on the couch
• Giving a back rub or massage
• Playing with their hair
• Touching their face gently
• Sitting close together
• Resting your head on their shoulder
• Giving a high-five
• Linking arms while walking
• Touching their arm or leg while talking
• Wrapping your arms around their waist
• Resting your hand on their knee
• Rubbing their back gently
• Lightly brushing your fingers against theirs
• Snuggling in bed

These small acts of physical touch help to reinforce their emotional connection and demonstrate their love for each other.

Happy couples understand that showing physical affection to each other makes them more in tune and happier with each other. By maintaining regular physical contact, happy couples create a sense of closeness and emotional security in their relationship.

8. Happy Couples Share Responsibilities Equally

Equally sharing responsibilities is a key factor in maintaining a balanced relationship and is one of the things happy couples do differently.

Happy couples divide household chores, financial responsibilities, and parenting duties in a way that is fair to both partners. This balance ensures that neither partner feels overwhelmed or taken for granted.

A woman was slowly losing herself to the rigors of childcare, cleaning, and taking care of her husband and the home front whilst working her day-to-day job. The stress accumulated and became depression.

It worsened when she tried to make her partner help her and he refused. She walked into my office to seek counsel because she was contemplating leaving her husband and children, and the urge to abandon everything and walk away was incredibly strong.

Often, when one partner is doing everything, there will always be burnout, fatigue, and exhaustion. Her husband had to come down from his high horse if he didn’t want to lose his marriage and adapt to the situation at hand; their marriage was better for it.

Sharing responsibilities also involves supporting each other’s needs and being flexible when circumstances change.

Happy couples communicate openly about their expectations and work together to find solutions that work for both of them. This collaborative attitude fosters a sense of teamwork and mutual respect, which makes each partner not feel alone.

9. Happy Couples Keep Their Individuality

The concept of one is good but losing yourself in your marriage? Never.

One of the things happy couples do differently in their relationship is that they maintain their individuality even in their bliss moments.

Maintaining individuality is important for personal growth and overall happiness and this is something that happy couples are super intentional about.

Happy couples understand that while they are one, they are also individuals with their own interests, hobbies, and friends. They encourage each other to pursue these individual interests because they know that it contributes to their overall well-being.

10. Happy Couples Surprise Each Other With Small Gestures

Small gestures of love and appreciation are one of the little things that makes a big difference in a relationship and this is one of the amazing things happy couples do differently and do not miss out on.

Happy couples make an effort to surprise each other with thoughtful acts, whether it’s a surprise date, a favorite treat, or a heartfelt note. These unexpected gestures show that they are thinking about each other and that they care.

By the way, check out these ways you can show your partner small gestures of love and affection.

Surprising each other is one of the ways to keep the relationship exciting and hot, and of course, it adds an element of spontaneity.

Happy couples understand that it’s the little things that often mean the most and that these small acts of kindness and thoughtfulness strengthen their bond and bring them closer together.

11. Happy Couples Practice Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a crucial component of a healthy relationship and is one of the things happy couples do differently.

Happy couples understand that mistakes and misunderstandings are a natural part of life, and they are willing to forgive each other when things go wrong. This willingness to forgive makes them let go. They communicate their grievances which prevents resentment from building up and allows the relationship to move forward.

12. Happy Couples Create Traditions And Rituals

Happy couples develop their own unique traditions, whether it’s a weekly date night, a special holiday celebration, or a daily routine that they share. These rituals provide a sense of uniqueness and stability in the relationship.

Traditions and rituals also create lasting memories and give couples something to look forward to. Happy couples take pride in these activities and make an effort to keep them alive, even during busy or challenging times.

Final Thoughts: Things Happy Couples Do Differently

Happy couples are very ordinary people who have an extraordinary determination to make the most of their marriage, to love each other and intentionally sustain their emotional connection. They are people who might not have the most glamorous love story but by being intentional, they stand as the true testament of love and commitment.

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